I’m hunting for ideas for people who want to make up for the money I’m not paying into the government treasury. Use the email link off to the left to send me your ideas.

Ways you can support the federal government

  • Have a smoke!: For every pack of cigarettes you buy, the manufacturer will donate 39 cents to the federal government — this is above and beyond the tax you paid on the income to buy the ciggies, the payroll taxes paid by the tobacco industry, state taxes, and payoffs to various lawsuit-happy attorneys general!
  • Pay at the pump!: For every gallon you put in your car, the feds get another 18-and-a-half cents to spend. (Again, above and beyond…)
  • Earn Income!: For every six or seven dollars you earn (on average), you’ll give one of those dollars to be spent by the U.S. Congress.
  • Raise that mug!: At the bottom of every pint of beer is a federal excise tax nickel. The feds get 21 to 67 cents for your bottle of wine. Finish off that bottle of hard liquor and your Senator has another $2.14 to argue over.
  • Enjoy Burning Man!: Half the price of your ticket goes straight to the federal Bureau of Land Management — what they don’t use to buy night-vision goggles and bong-seeking-missiles for use on the playa they get to keep as profit.
  • Go shooting!: A sweet 10–11% of the cost of your firearm, and your shells and cartridges go to help Congress figure out new ways to interfere with your right to bear arms. (As always, above and beyond…)

Other federal excise taxes apply to cars and car parts, tires, coal, fishing equipment, vaccines, phone service, air travel, water travel, heavy vehicles and probably a bunch of other things. Can you help me with my list?

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