George R. Simpson is a software engineer, entrepeneur and inventor of some accomplishment. Several years ago he made his most important discovery - that God had hidden important insights about His universe inside the English language and certain ordered naming schemes that use the same character set (the books of the bible, the periodic table of the elements, roman numerals).

For reasons that are somewhat unclear even if you read his FAQ, he calls this language-within-a-language the ET Corn Gods Language.

It works something like this:

1. Take a word, the real meaning of which you are curious, say, "Monster"
2. There are a number of ways you might approach this word, one way would be to start at the first letter, "M" which is the 13^th letter of the alphabet.
3. Take the digits in 13, and subtract one from the other: 3-1 = 2
4. Find the corresponding letter of the alphabet: 2="B"
5. "B" is the symbol for the element "Boron"
6. You can drop "o"s, which, like their equivalents, zeroes, don't really count for anything; ergo: "Boron" = "Born"
7. Now let's take the "ster" in "Monster"; That's letters 19, 20, 5, and 18
8. You could rearrange that as a date: 5/18/1920, or May 18th 1920. Curiously enough, that's the birthdate of Pope John Paul II
9. Let's go back to that "M" and try another tack. One of the rules in the ET Corn Gods Game is that you can add 66 to a number or letter as many times as you need to; "M"+66+66 = 145 = 14,5 = "N","E" = "Ne"
10. "Ne" is the standard abbreviation for the book of "Nehemiah," the 16th book in the bible
11. This corresponds to "P," the 16th letter in the alphabet
12. Okay, skip over the null-like "o" in "Monster" and go straight to the "N," letter 14: "14"="1,4"="A","D"="Ad"
13. Are you with me so far? Okay, under certain circumstances you can swap adjacent numbers/letters; this is one such case, so "Ad"="Da"
14. "Da" = "D","A" = 5,1 to which we can add a "silent" zero to make "501"
15. "501" = "50","1"
16. "50" = roman numeral "L" and "1" = "A" (the first letter of the alphabet). So "50" = "La"
17. "LA" = "L","A" = "12,1" = "121"
18. Flip "121" backwards and you get "121" again (I'm not too sure why this step is necessary, maybe it's so you can subtract rather than add in the next step)
19. Subtract 66 from 121 to get 55
20. Remember that "50" is "L" in roman numerals, so you can rewrite 55 as "L5" but "E" is the fifth letter of the alphabet, so you can go further and make this "Le"
21. We're almost done. Remember how the "M" in "Monster" became "P" earlier, then we skipped over the "o" without transmogrifying it and went to the "n" and turned that into "Le" so "Mon"="Pole"? And remember how "ster" was a sly way of hiding the pope's birthday? And remember how the leading "M" emphasized this interpretation by translating to "born"?
22. Add this all up and "Monster" = "Pole born 18 May 1920" - makes you wonder, doesn't it?